Friday 14th of June 2024

Nairobi, Kenya

The Art Of Masturbation

The female orgasm is hard to find, but, the woman that finds it never forgets her first orgasm. However, this journey isn’t simple, and it’s tied to the art of masturbation.

Masturbation is anxiety and stress-reliever than any woman can use after a long day of work. Also, not all women can orgasm naturally through traditional vaginal sex so, they have to get creative to reach the seventh heaven. Wink, wink, it also releases built-up sexual tension, especially during a lockdown when your fix is miles away.

Masturbation helps keep the vagina healthy because of the extra blood flow. That’s why it gets hot down there when you’re in the mood.

So, Sex Guru is outlining a few tips that touch on the art of masturbation.

Masturbation is a taboo topic. So start by talking about it freely with close friends so that you can reduce the taboos around it. It opens the door for sharing ideas and insights amongst trusted friends.  Some women feared the power of their bodies. They grew up when sexuality was vilified but are now coming into themselves.

Around 50 to 75% of women can’t orgasm through vaginal intercourse alone and need clitoral stimulation according, to Teen Vogue.

With masturbation, it lets women get in touch with their bodies intimately and know what works for them. During intimate encounters, women can tap into this knowledge and have satisfying sex lives. It can reduce problems that come up because of frustrated sexual lives. 

Since orgasms aren’t easy to reach them, shift your mind into thinking about how each climax this helps strengthen your pelvic muscles just like Kegels exercises. So you’re able to do the workout without investing in Kegel balls. 

Be creative. You can masturbate with toys and fingers while you’re lying down in bed or even with a showerhead while you’re standing in the shower. Always practise proper hygiene before you start. Try different positions while you’re masturbating.

Make yourself comfortable. You can use music to calm down. Lock the door. Close the curtains. Take your time as you try to figure out what works for you. Feel free to use a mirror if you’re not exactly sure about all your bits. 

Like did you know that the clitoris has ‘legs’ called Vestibular Bulbs and will become hard while sexually aroused similar to a penis? It’s super sensitive. It swells up like a penis when it’s excited.

Try sitting on your bed with your back straight up. Place a mirror in front of you so you can see your entire vulva. Clear your mind so that you can focus on only pleasing yourself. Rub around your outer labia and clitoris to see which places feel good and to get yourself in the mood. Then, split apart the outer labia with two fingers in a V-shape facing downwards so that you get better access to your clitoris. 

With the clitoris exposed, you can try different variations to pull an orgasm out of your body. You can use another finger to rub up and down the clitoris. If you move slowly, then it’ll take time to build up your orgasm but, if you move, with rapid motions, then you’ll climax faster and feel your body shudder under you. 

Still, with the same speeds, you can rub in circular motions around the clitoris and focusing on sweet spots. Alternatively, some women rub against items like towels and pillows.

Show love to other erogenous zones. Some women can climax through nipple play because the nipple has many nerve endings. On your nipples, you try different touches but with varying intensity to see what works for you. During menstruation, they tend to be more sensitive than usual. 

You can try sex toys to stimulate your nipples or simple items that have different temperatures like ice vs warm massage oil. Think about your body and which sex toys can excite different parts. It includes vibrators that offer both vaginal and clitoral stimulation or anal toys. On the other hand, you can use more than one toy by inserting one into the vagina whilst letting the other one stimulate your clitoris.

Use lubes if your vagina doesn’t produce enough natural lubrication. 

Delay your orgasm when it feels close and experiments with your body. It’ll increase the intensity of your orgasm.

How To Look After Your Vagina

A Vagina is a flower that goes by other names that include honeypot, punani, yoni, vulva, cunt, cookie, peach and et cetera.

The vagina is an internal organ that connects the uterus to the outside world. It has two main functions: a pleasure receptor during sex or for delivering babies through natural childbirth. However, when a woman is menstruating, then she bleeds through her vagina till her cycle is over.

So how does one look after their vagina?

The vagina is a self-cleaning organ through vaginal discharge, and, it has a PH level.


Healthy Diet

Looking after it starts with eating a healthy diet, filled with fruits, vegetables, water and physical exercise. Exercises include walking,  running and, kegel exercises to strengthen the pelvic floor.


Gentle Soap

Use gentle soaps that don’t have any scents to clean around your vagina. Always clean this area whenever you’re showering to keep it clean. During your periods, you might need to wash this area more than once a day. 


No Vaginal Douching

The vagina hosts healthy bacteria that are there to protect it. They balance out the vagina’s PH level, to keep the bacteria healthy and dominant than harmful bacteria that might enter the vagina. However, vaginal douche disturbs the PH level and affects the protection offered by the good bacteria in the vagina.


Pubic Hair

You don’t have to remove all of your pubic hair since it protects your vagina from extra bacteria. It also acts as a barrier between your skin and your underwear which is helpful, especially during hot and humid weather. You also don’t have to worry about that area becoming itchy.


Safe Sex

Practice safe sex and use a condom every time.


PAP Smears

Do pelvic exams, PAP Smears and consult your gynaecologist regularly. Get the HPV vaccine, if possible.


Use Lubrication

If you’re experiencing vaginal dryness,  use lubrication with your partner to protect your vagina from pain and, tearing during sex. 


Cotton Underwear

Wear cotton underwear because your body will breathe easily and absorb any extra moisture. Alternatively, you can go commando and let your vagina breathe.


Non-Scented Sanitary Pads

Be aware that scented pads and tampons can cause irritation and affect the PH level down there. So stay away from scented sanitary products.



Do self-examinations on your vulva with a mirror and sit in a comfortable position. Look for things that seem abnormal like moles, birthmarks, and skin tags. Lumps can be a sign of vaginal cancer but always seek professional help.


Sex Toys

Be mindful about which sex toys work for your vagina. Get something that feels comfortable and doesn’t irritate the vagina. Sex toys have different materials so, there’s something for everyone.



Love the vagina that you have by embracing it, since, they come in different shapes and sizes.